Saturday, November 7, 2009

My Popo..

Saturday, November 7, 2009
Popo @ Po..It's been a long time since i call this name..I used to call my grandmother using that..How i miss not being able to call her again..13 April 2008 will forever be in my memory..It's the day where my grandmother went to be with the Lord in heaven..I still remember it quite clearly..It was a usual, my sister and i went to church for morning service..The night before, she was already admitted at the hospital ( She fainted at home )..My mum and aunties stayed overnight at the hospital with her...After service, came the news that was so hard to digest..Daddy told us that mum and my aunties already decided to take off the machine which is helping her breath which means they were going to let her go..I know how hard it must have been for them to come up with this decision...Daddy drove us straight to Popo's house..They were going to bring her back to the house to die..At that moment, i just don't know what to think..My aunties, uncles and cousins were all there...Waiting for the ambulance to send her back home..Soon, the ambulance reached..Popo was wheeled in to her room..She was still on her machine..I couldn't hold back my tears seeing her like this and tears start rolling down like mad..The next part was the hardest..Letting go of her..Seeing the paramedics taking off the machine was like a stab into the heart..I broke down again..We were all asked to say our last words to her...Can you imagine how it feels??..It's heartbreaking...After making sure she had passed on, the people in charge of the funeral came to set up everything needed for the funeral..It's still kinda hard to accept at that time because it's the first death of one of the person who is closed to me...
She was always worried about me because i have asthma when i am younger...I was always admitted to the hospital because of asthma and sometimes, she would be the one who stayed with me overnight at the hospital..She would search for anything that would cure my asthma to let me eat or drink...When i am in form 1-2, my younger sis and i would usually go to her place in the morning...Daddy would sent us there early in the morning and i would continue sleeping at her room..At about 9 something, she will come wake me up for breakfast..I still remember seeing her frying bread dipped with eggs and pancakes sitting at a high stool using her tiny wok..Her pancakes were always round and beautiful..lolx..For lunch, sometimes it would be porridge with some dishes and sometimes it would be ''mee hun ker"..if you know what that means..haha..Oh ya, and she loves eating her vege ''Sawi"..It's definitely her favourite..Her dinner was always awesome..Her dishes was delicious..Some of the dishes i love was her ''Pork with green chillies" and " dark colour pork ribs"...My auntie cooked it for us once in a while but still it's not the same as her cooking..There are really too much memories with her..I don't think i will be able to write it all down here though..My post is already becoming like an essay..>.<
Popo, i do miss you once in a while..Time do pass really fast sometimes...It's almost 2 years already since you are gone...My life will never be the same without you but still life has to go on...The memories we had together was priceless and i will remember it forever till death..I know you must be watching over us from heaven now..Although you are not here with us, but we will forever remember you in our hearts..and i never get to say this when you are alive or maybe because we Asians are just not use to saying or expressing it directly...I just wanna say '' I Love You Popo "...Miss you always...


Mummy said...

Oh dear, how you made me cry pouring out your thoughts on my beloved mum. When I read this, my tears just kept rolling down for I can remember very vividly all these memories. You are right, the thoughest decision I have made in my life was to let her go...I don't have a choice. We were informed that she got not much time left that day so we brought her home to die. Without the machine, she wouldn't survive so were grateful to the doctor to let us bring her home alive. Whether my mum forgives me or not, I think that is the best option at that time. But somehow I believed my mum understands for now she is up there in heaven looking down over us with a smile on her face and joy in her heart for she now suffers no more. May she rest in peace. I love her as much as you do and I am glad that you remember all these, all that she had done for you. Never erase her from your memories as long as you live for she is one great woman we cannot afford to forget.

XinKun said...

Really touching.. T^T
I call my grandma mama(a slightly different tone)..
May ur popo rest in peace!

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